Asking a lender for a debt write-off - Surviving Economic Abuse (2024)

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Coercing a partner into debt is a common tactic that perpetratorsof economic abuse use. They seek to createinstability, andmake itdifficult for you to leave and rebuildyour life.

An abuser mayhave:

  • forced you to take out credit
  • used credit in your name
  • made youuse your credit against your wishes.

This may have left you withdebts youcan’trepay.

There area number ofsolutions to coerced debt that you canexplore with aqualified debt adviser. These include explaining thecirc*mstances to the lender andasking them to write off the debt.This is not a guaranteed solution. It is important to speak to anadviser about all your options and the best option for you.

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Tackling coerced debt

You are in debt to a lender (acreditor) ifthere is money owing on a credit agreementin your name. The credit agreement is alegal obligation to repay the debt.

If you have been coerced into taking out thecredit agreement, or if the abuser’s behaviourhas forced you into spending more creditthan you can afford, repaying the debt mayfeel extremely unfair. By working with aqualified debt adviser, you may be able tofind asolution that is manageable for you andhelps relieve the pressure of the debt.

“I was already feeling vulnerable in my home life and worried about keeping myself and my children safe. But dealing with creditors chasing me for money amplified my anxiety of the whole world collapsing on top of me.”

Some people decide to ask the lender fora debt write-off. This is successful in a smallnumber of cases, however there is no legalobligation on the lender to write off anymoney owed to them. Whether this is theright course of action for you will dependon your personal circ*mstances. If it issomething you wish to pursue, it will help todo this with the support of a qualified debtadviser. You can discuss with them otheroptions, including debt management andinsolvency.We have resources on thesetopics, and on challenging the liability forcoerced debt if this is something that youwish to consider.

All debt solutions, including seekinga write-off, can have long-termconsequences depending on yourcirc*mstances. If you wish to ask a lenderto write off money you owe, it is advisableto do this with the support of a qualifieddebt adviser.

Can a debt be written off?

It is not easy to convince a lender to writeoff a debt that is owed to them. However,some people have successfully asked thelender to write off a debt by explaining thecirc*mstances of the abuse. It is not alwayssuccessful and the response you receive willvary from lender to lender. Some lendersmay refuse while others agree.

Sometimes, a lender may be sympatheticto your situation. Others may need to beconvinced that there is no hope of themoney being repaid and so it is not worthpursuing the debt.

Requesting a debt write-off can be moredifficult if you have assets, such as aproperty, in your name. When a debt adviserrequests a write-off, they will usually sendthe lender an income and expenditure formto show that youdon’thave assets or surplusincome. The lender may be less likely toagree to a debt write-off if you have moneyleft over or assets.

Good practice guidelines

The UK Finance 2021 Financial Abuse Code outlineson how banks and building societiesshould respond to financial abuse. Thisincludes recommending that firms providesupport for customers with debt and arrears.It advises banks to respond to customerson a case-by-case basis. It also advises them to adapt usualprocesses where appropriate to helpcustomers experiencing abuse.

These good practice guidelines place nolegal obligation on lenders to write off anycustomer’s debts. A decision on whether towrite off a debt is at the lender’s discretion.

Mental health

The Money Advice Liaison Group givesguidance on how debt can have anegative impact on mental health. Theyhave producedGood Practice AwarenessGuidelinesfor helping consumers withmental health conditions and debt. Theguidelines say that lenders shouldconsiderwriting off debt when:

  • the customer has a long-term mentalhealth condition
  • the condition is unlikely to improve
  • it is unlikely that the customer would beable to repay their debts.

If you have experienced mental healthdifficulties, asking for a debt write-off on thesegrounds may be another option for you.

If coerced debt is affecting your mentalhealth, a qualified debt adviser may suggestthat you consider using the Debt and MentalHealth Evidence Form. This is a short formthat can be completed by health and socialcare professionals to confirm the effectsof the debt on your mental health. It canhelp lenders understand your situation andassess what support they can offer.

“I was so relieved when mydebt adviser explained thesituation to the creditor and they agreed to write it off.It’sone less thing hangingover me while I start my newlife. Before, I was constantlyanxious about whether Iwould have enough moneyin my account to make thepayments every month.”

Before approaching a lender

Gather information about creditagreements in your name

The abuser may have taken out credit inyour name without yourknowledge. They may also havewithheld information about creditagreements in your name from you.

Information about your credit record is heldby credit reference agencies. You canrequest a copy of your credit report fromthem. The agencies may each hold differentinformation. You may wish to get acopy of your report from each of the threemain credit reference agencies in the UK – Experian,EquifaxandTransUnion.

As part of the UK Finance 2021 Financial Abuse Code, all lenders are also advisedto support people with information onaccounts held with them.

Speak to a qualified debt adviser

Before writing to a lender to ask for adebt write-off, speak to a qualified debtadviser and explain your circ*mstancesto them. It is important to let them knowthe details of your situation along with asmuch information as you can about debtsin your name, so that they can best adviseyou on all the options available. There are organisations that can support you to find aqualified debt adviser.

Writing to the lender

Asking a lender for a write-off a is nota guaranteed solution to debt. There isno formula for what to say to lead to asuccessful outcome. The responseyou receive will vary from lender to lender.However, a qualified debt adviser cansupport you to draft a letter that shares thedetails of your circ*mstances. This will make thelender aware of the situation so they canmake a decision.

In your letter, you may wish to include:

  • Details of your situation:Your debt advisercan work with you on wording that explainsthe abuse you have experienced and howthis has affected your economic position.
  • How the debt arose:You may wish togive information about how the debtarose. This could include sayingwhether the abuser forced you totake out a credit agreement or if this wasdone without your knowledge.
  • Evidence of your situation:Somepeople include evidence of their situation, such as: a letter from a GP, orother health or social care professional;letters from any domestic abuse servicesupporting you; and crime report numbersor copies of injunctions. Discuss this furtherwith your debt adviser.

“My daughter thought thatshe may be entitled to havethe debts written off. Whenshe contacted the companiesto explain the situation,though, they advised thatbecause the debts are in hername it’s her responsibility topay them off in full.”

The lender’s reply

If you receive a response from the lender,it is important to discuss this with your debtadviser and to speak to them about yournext steps. There area number ofways inwhich a lender may respond to a request fora debt write-off.

Refusing to write off the debt

With your debt adviser, you may wish toreply to the lender to ask them to explainwhy they have refused to write off the debt,if they have not given reasons in their reply.

Offering to fully write off the debt

In some cases, the lender may decide that,based on the information you haveprovided, they are able to write off the debtthat is owing on credit agreements in yourname. It is important to keep any lettersconfirming that the lender has agreed towrite off the debt. Check your letters with adebt adviser to be sure that this is what thelender is offering.

Agreeing not to pursue the debt

The lender may agree not pursue you forthe money owing, but this does not meanthe debt is written off. Money is stillowedand the debt may still appear on your creditfile. If youreceive a letter that states you willnot be pursued for the amount owing, show this toyour debt adviser. They candiscuss this further with you.

Not replying

If the lender does not reply to your request,this does not mean that the debt is writtenoff. They could get back in touch with youto pursue the rest of the money owing atany time.

Other things to consider in relationto the lender’s reply

  • Keep a copy of any letters you send tolenders and replies that you receive.
  • If the lender follows up with aphonecall,ask them to respond in writing.
  • If you are not happy with the lender’sbehaviour, make a note of the details. This may be helpful if you later decide tocomplain.

Remember that getting a debt written offcan have a long-term effect on your creditrating. Lenders may record the write-off onyour credit report using the terms ‘settled’ or‘partially settled’. This may affect your abilityto get credit in the future. Before writing to alender to ask for a debt to be written off, youshould speak to a qualified debt adviser.

“I had been putting offspeaking to anyone as I didn’tknow how to approach thesecompanies. But with the helpof my debt adviser, I wassuccessful in removing acontract in my name and thedebt was written off in full.”

Other ways of tacklingcoerced debt

Asking a creditor to write off your debts issuccessful in some cases and not in others.It is not right for everyone. It is importantto speak to a qualified debt adviser aboutyour circ*mstances and all your options.

Other debt solutions may be available,including challenging the liability of thecredit agreement, a debt management planor insolvency.We have resources on thesetopics. The right option for you will dependentirely on your circ*mstances, so advicefrom a qualified debt adviser is essential.We have details of some organisations you may wish to contactfor support.

Through the Economic Justice Project, SEAhas been working to challenge debt thathas been coerced. This includes workingwith domestic abuse and money/debtadvice services,creditorsand other financialservices as well as influencing policy.

Last updated August 2022

Further support

If you are experiencing economic abuse, youare not alone. We have more information thatcan support you to take steps towards safetyand begin to regain control of your finances.

Debt
Survivors’ Forum
Financial Support Line
Asking a lender for a debt write-off - Surviving Economic Abuse (2024)

FAQs

Asking a lender for a debt write-off - Surviving Economic Abuse? ›

Some people decide to ask the lender for a debt write-off. This is successful in a small number of cases, however there is no legal obligation on the lender to write off any money owed to them. Whether this is the right course of action for you will depend on your personal circ*mstances.

What is a financial coercion? ›

It involves someone else controlling your spending or access to cash, assets and finances. This can leave you feeling isolated, lacking in confidence and trapped. Sometimes (but not always) financial abuse will be recognised by the police as coercive or controlling behaviour, which is also a criminal offence.

How do you recover from financial manipulation? ›

  1. Details to consider if you plan to leave. The first step in exiting a financially abusive relationship is to develop a plan. ...
  2. Open a bank account and start saving. ...
  3. Make a budget. ...
  4. Make a plan to tackle credit card debt. ...
  5. Local food banks. ...
  6. Government assistance. ...
  7. Domestic abuse coalitions.
Mar 17, 2023

Can I ask for debt to be written off? ›

You can ask the people you owe to write of your debts if this sounds like you. Some creditors may agree if: They understand you will not be able to pay. They see you have no assets to sell.

How do you respond to financial abuse? ›

Taking back control after financial abuse
  1. Recognising financial abuse.
  2. Opening a new current or savings account.
  3. Joint accounts.
  4. Keep your account passwords and security safe.
  5. Joint credit cards.
  6. Checking your credit record.
  7. If you're claiming Universal Credit.
  8. Get someone you trust to help manage your money.

What is financial Gaslighting? ›

McCullough (pictured above, left) defines financial gaslighting as a form of abuse characterized by the deliberate falsification of financial information, or deliberately providing false accounts of financial transactions over time.

What is the Coerced debt Relief Act? ›

The bill restricts claimants from bringing actions to collect coerced debt against an individual who coerced the debt to within five years of the date a court determines that the individual caused the duress, intimidation, threat of force, force, fraud, or undue influence giving rise to the coerced debt.

What is narcissistic financial abuse? ›

One form of abuse typically favored by a covert narcissist is narcissistic financial abuse—when an abuser uses money or financial resources to manipulate or control another person, such as a partner, child, or other family member.

Is economic abuse the same as financial abuse? ›

Economic abuse and financial abuse involve similar behaviours, but it can be helpful to think of financial abuse as a subcategory of economic abuse. Economic abuse encompasses the many ways that an abuser may control someone's economic situation, including employment and housing, for example.

What is an example of economic abuse? ›

“Women in intimate partner relationships may experience Economic Abuse in a variety of forms. It may involve being denied access to bank accounts, information and decision-making rights regarding family finances or having severely curtailed choices regarding purchases.

What qualifies as a bad debt write-off? ›

Bad debt is an amount of money that a creditor must write off if a borrower defaults on the loans. If a creditor has a bad debt on the books, it becomes uncollectible and is recorded as a charge-off.

How do I get my creditors to write-off debt? ›

A creditor will need proof that you are unable to pay their debt back. It will help your case if you actually stop payment when you make your request for a write-off, rather than going without basic essentials so that you can offer the creditor a token payment.

When can a bad debt be written off? ›

The general rule is to write off a bad debt when you're unable to connect with your client. You should also write it off if they haven't shown any willingness to set up a payment plan, or the debt has been unpaid for more than 90 days.

How is financial abuse proven? ›

You need hard evidence to prove that the suspect exploited the senior financially. This could include bank statements, copies of processed checks, or copies of legal documents.

What questions to ask for financial abuse? ›

We find that some adults worry about money; may I ask you a few questions about this? Questions you can ask: Does someone help you manage your money day-to-day? Do you run out of money at the end of the month?

Can you get PTSD from financial abuse? ›

Financial trauma can cause negative thoughts, flashbacks and anxiety — symptoms that mirror post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD.

What are the three types of coercion? ›

Researchers have identified a number of interpersonal coercive methods:
  • “positive” persuasion (e.g., compliments; making promises; paying special attention or “grooming”. ...
  • neutral tactics of persuasion (e.g., continually requesting, nagging or leading for sex);
  • physical persuasion tactics(e.g., kissing, sexual touching);

What is the most common form of coercion? ›

Physical. Physical coercion is the most commonly considered form of coercion, where the content of the conditional threat is the use of force against a victim, their relatives or property.

What can be considered coercion? ›

(2) The term “coercion” means— (A) threats of serious harm to or physical restraint against any person; (B) any scheme, plan, or pattern intended to cause a person to believe that failure to perform an act would result in serious harm to or physical restraint against any person; or (C) the abuse or threatened abuse of ...

What are examples of financial exploitation? ›

Examples of financial exploitation may include:

Possessions are disappearing from household. Unexplained withdrawals from bank accounts. Sudden change in banking practice. Sudden, additional names on bank accounts.

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